Anx is mounting.

I'm in the final preparations before my departure to Arusha, and I'm not pretending that I am at all confident in my ventures.  I'm actually quite nervous presently, concerned about the difference in medical practice in TZ, and how I've always done it on this side of the pond.  Will I know what to do?  Will I be of any help to them?  Am I going to fall flat on my face the first day, overcome with jet lag, overwhelmed with the language barrier and the (possibly) primitive practice settings?  What has filled me with even more trepidation is that listed on my placement itinerary, my official position on this rotation is 'Doctor in charge', not 'medical student', not 'visiting student' but 'Doctor in charge'.  I am fully aware that in less than 5 months now I will be graduating and will have the rightful title of doctor, but to see it on my itinerary as the one in charge only adds to the weight of my plight.  I will still have supervision in Arusha from my understanding, but exactly how much supervision is TBD.  I can already guess that this experience will stretch me in ways that I am not expecting.  I guess I am prepared, God will be there (hopefully I do not forget this in my scariest moments).

I remember when I left for my study abroad semester in Ireland, some dear college friends gave me a send off card that I held quite close during the times of struggles and tears.  Included with their kind send-offs and well-wishes, they also wrote down Psalm 139:7-12. "Where shall I go from your Spirit?  Or where shall I flee from your presence?  If I ascend to heaven, you are there!  If I make my bed in Sheol, you are there!  If I take the wings of the morning and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea, even there your hand shall lead me, and your right hand shall hold me.  If I say, 'Surely the darkness shall cover me, and the light about me be night,' even the darkness is not dark to you; the night is bright as the day, for darkness is as light with you." ESV  So whether I am filled with fear and trembling, I take comfort in not treading alone.